This blog is closed...

Until further notice.
To the few, the proud, the faithful readership, I offer my humble thanks for your interest and commentary. I also offer my sincere apologies for the circumstances beyond my control that have led me to postpone this particular imram until a later date in time. Rest assured, if/when the time comes, I will resurrect this blog- provided I remember my username/password.
Again, thank you all for your interest, commentary and support. Please keep me in your prayers from here on out, too.
I hate goodbyes, and closing this blog 'until further notice' is probably a euphemistic way of saying 'forever' and it's a goodbye. (Why yes, I am a melancholic... however did you guess?)I feel like there are more things I should say, about dealing with disappointments like this, and tying it all in a proper imram metaphor. But I'm tired, discouraged and feeling unaccountably lonely at present.
So I'll wrap this up, in proper paradoxical fashion.
Hallo/Viszlat.

Blogspot ate my nifty title.... and nearly ate this post.

Apologies to my faithful readership (all five or so of you)! I hadn't forgotten about this blog, but it kept not being a priority to update. I want to get back into regular updates, but realistically I don't know if that's going to happen. Still, I can update now so I will.
So... A lot has happened. A lot. It's been almost a month. Wow. So, I will do my best to fill in the details of what has been going on for this almost a month.
At the beginning of this month, my dad offered to pay for me to attend an LI school, Foreign Service Opportunities. As you all may remember, I was between housing situations in FR. Nothing worked out. Nothing... The Daleys were very generous, and I will forever be grateful for them for taking me in on short notice and with so little extra space. But I knew I couldn't stay there for longer than two weeks and there was nothing else opening as another possible opportunity for a place to live. So, I went to the LI school more or less homeless, but oddly okay with it. Sort of detached. It was weird.
So I got there the night before it started, all dressed up and put-together looking, and met my classmates. They were a nice enough bunch. I also found a nearby pub that has cider (yay!), so if anyone's ever in Clarendon and needs a recommendation, I can tell you where it is!;)
We started classes the next day and I had a revelation. I was typing, but I couldn't keep up with the speaker's pace. I couldn't seem to make my fingers work fast enough and when I was fast, I wasn't accurate. My brain didn't seem to be working properly either. I tell you guys, I seriously felt like it was rusty from disuse! As you might imagine, that was kind of frightening. After about three hours of this weird panicky 'why isn't my brain working' feeling, I finally hit my stride and was back up to normal speed and skill. But that lack had made a definite impression. It was disuse.
And over the next two days, I realised I couldn't go back to working at Subway, even if I did somehow find housing- which didn't seem too likely!
I have skills, I have training, I have a degree. I _have_ to do something more with my life.
That's what I was thinking.
So, I talked with my dad and we made arrangements for me to come home on the Sunday after the LI school. It wasn't an easy decision, and it some ways it didn't feel like a decision I'd made freely, but I really didn't have anywhere else to live, and I was feeling more and more strongly all the time that FR would be a dead-end for me. I needed to be somewhere else.
(Btw, I still _want_ to be going overseas ASAP...)
So I came home. And I was home for exactly two days before I decided to go and visit Coriel, Chigger and family. I got a warm welcome, and really enjoyed my stay there, it was so good to talk to Coriel and Chigger. All three of us must have remakred about a dozen times on the awesomeness of being able to visit without a paper hanging heavy over our heads! Coriel and I also watched a lot of Psych and the entire series of Firefly, which was interesting.

The ride back from Coriel and Chigger's was the most interesting part, unfortunately. I was supposed to meet my dad at a pub, and while I managed to do that part right, in his haste for us to leave, I forgot my cellphone. Though I called the place the next day and offered a reward for the safe return of my cellphone- even minus minutes etc, no luck. So, alas, my old phone number is gone. I have a new one now, which I will spread via FB and emails at a later date and time- probably tomorrow. So, it was a long and traumatic process to get a new phone number, I only just managed to finish putting that all together today. So, faithful readership. Please email or FB me your phone numbers and I'll get back to you with mine ASAP.

There is more to update/catch up on/backpost about, but I have been sitting here at Panera for about three hours, job searching, emailing people about jobs, and posting info about the yard sale I have to organise for tomorrow. While _very_ slowly drinking my chai latte. Very slowly. Hopefully I will be able to post tomorrow, with the rest of the update and the results of the yard sale... We'll see how it goes.
All the best to all my readers!

Insert transition...

But life isn't as simple as editing music videos. If nothing else in this whole experience, I've learned that nowhere on earth is home. You will always have to pick up and go- it's just a matter of how much junk you have to take with you, who you're leaving and who you're going to. It's not even the where, but the who... >sigh<
I will have fond memories of this past month spent here. I just felt like I was getting used to things and here I go again. I knew it when I signed up for it. But it's still a little jarring. I moved my futon and most of my stuff today. All I have left to pack are two bags and that's it. I also found a place I might live at- if I can pick up that second job. I need to call the agency ASAP. I don't want to, but I need to. I need those hours and that kind of money. I'm working tomorrow- I wasn't scheduled to, but they were desperate so it's 9-2 for me. Five hours. Then vespers around 6, meaning leaving here around 4.30... And Byzantine, so we'll be standing the whole time. And so forth and so on.
J-chan, in reference to your early comment/question, LI= Leadership Institute. They're running an FSO school Mon/Tues and I'm going to it... I dunno why in some respects. I mean, I'll probably get posted to some godforsaken place like Ghana... yurgh...
"But it'll be with a group!"
Yay....
I dunno. The only thing I could think of today at work is how overqualified I am for my current job. Where do some of my fellow graduates get their jobs from? The Heavenly Employment/Job Opportunities Center? NO. I know everyone makes their own opportunity. Not to say you don't thank God when you get it, but you work like it all depends on you and pray like it all depends on God.
I just don't want to come to Judgement Day and be asked to give a reckoning of time/talents wasted.
I'm soo tired.
I prayed for you all tonight at my holy hour- I prayed for my readership and for everyone who has prayed for me during this past month and a half of transit/strangeness/insanity.

I did it...

I dyed my hair tonight, with the gracious help of SuprNico, who proved to be even more Supr than usual in her assistance! She did a great job- I think. It's kind of hard to tell now while my hair's still a bit damp what it's going to do. And it wasn't her fault that we forgot to use the conditioner. So now my hair is a frizz-ball of blackish-reddish hue. Further updates as this situation develops.
Picked up a housing app. I have to be able to pay at least $600 a month. That's not happening. It just isn't. Don't know what I'm going to do now...
Tomorrow I move my futon into the Daleys' flat, as well as whatever other heavy items of my stuff I don't want to deal with on Saturday can be moved.
I'm tired. I don't want to move anything right now. I worked three hours OT today. Wish I was being paid time and a half for that, but oh well.
Sleep now.
Keep the prayers coming!

Closing

Working 'til closing at Subway really means working until everything is done. Thankfully it looks like I'm getting a permanent schedule change to daytime shift. I guess I'll miss some of the quirks of the nightcrew, but overall, I appreciate being able to walk to/from work during daylight hours. So the big crunch time is this weekend, what with moving somewhere and trying to work the schedule such that I can get to an LI school (FSO school). My dad is willing to pay for this. But not for a TEFL course. I see there is an issue of priority here...
Anyway...
I'm tired, I'm bitter, and I'm itinerant. I'm also a complainer. I just have to keep focusing on the fact that this is an imram. No one said it would be easy or comfortable, or fun. Just not boring. Ever.
Prayers please!

Just a short post...

basically just making a 'post of the day' sort of thing. I didn't work today because I thought I'd be starting night shift on the second job. That didn't actually end up working out. I called them and they said they need people on a day-by-day/case-by-case sort of basis. So I gave up a work day and traded a Friday for basically no reason whatsoever. And I can almost guarantee they'll want me to work tomorrow when I'm scheduled to work to close. Well they can stuff it. I don't care if they are paying $10/hr, if they won't start me soon or with a _consistent_ schedule, that's it.
I have a pounding headache. I called home today. That didn't go very well, but I got a chance to talk to my dad for the longest amount of time I've talked _just_ to him since graduation.
My head really hurts. I hope it's just dehydration.
I still need somewhere to live.

Anchor

So I had a Holy Hour today. It was nicer than usual, because the lady who shares it with me left about twenty minutes early and I had a private chat with Himself. And I thanked Him. I thanked Him for the experience as a whole, because obviously it means I'm supposed to learn something from it. I thanked Him for helping me keep on my pathetic little imrama-bound raft. I reiterated that if He didn't want me doing something, He was to stop me- otherwise I would proceed to the best of my ability. And that's what I'm doing.
Then I thought about anchors. One of Mary's titles is Anchor of Confidence. I didn't know that before today, but it's interesting. And as a melancholic temperament, the virtue I need to cultivate the most carefully, I think, is hope. So I'm trying to keep that in mind, even as I wonder where I'm going to live in five days...
Working the second shift at Subway tonight was an eye-opening experience. I learned that the night-shift manager is not exactly by the books, but she does seem very nice. She gave me some info about places in town that might be able to help me out- apparently Salvation Army helps with finding a place to live and there is some government sponsored housing where your rent payment is based on your income... We'll see how that goes. Hopefully something will work out with one of the families I want to live with.
And I still haven't called MG to tell her that I don't want to go to PA.
And I'm really, really tired.
Expect the posting schedule to change significantly as my schedule does likewise. And if after the 28th, I drop off the face of the earth briefly, say a little prayer- my raft may be in the middle of two large waves... What's that bit called again? A trough? Whatever. I'm really, really tired...

Last Shakespearean Sunday!

It was fun. But now I'm tired. Really, really tired. We had a good time altogether though, I think. The only non CC-girl present was THEJoe... Hehe. I kind of wish we had more guests, it was a little disappointing in that respect. But it was still fun. We did a sort of medley of scenes. I got to be Imogene from Cymbeline. That was fun- I got to nearly die from taking cat-poison and have hysterics upon waking up next to a beheaded corpse. Good times. Imogene's a fun character.
Then THEJoe, Avrilyn, K-ski and I all left to go to Confederate Cole's party. Much to our shock, we were the only guests there! Everyone else- except for the seminarian staying with his family- backed out at the last minute! So we had a good time and ate the refreshments provided. We would have played cricket but it rained so we spent a lot of time pouring over liturgical books and looking up stuff in Latin dictionaries. That was fun, but I still don't know what the Latin word for beer is...
We left early-ish, after seeing the cute little guinea hens they got recently- Bonny, Francis and Jude. They were about palm-sized, grey fluffy balls. Very, very cute. Apparently they eat ticks and this is the purpose for which they were bought. I just wonder how they'll get along with the dogs...
Well, I must cut this post shorter than I'd like to because I have to drive SuprNico to work first thing tomorrow morning. Thankfully I'm not working until four! W00t!
Again, I would like to apologise to my readership for my spaz session yesterday. I'm feeling much better today, though very, very tired.
So I bid you all goodnight!

Wedding comparisons, dress discussion and...

...resisting the urge to title this post 'I'm not okay, I promise'. It's late, I've had a lot of sugar in the past six hours and I'm feeling oddly emotionally fragile right now. The cautious (or maybe too incautious) optimism I had about getting this third shift factory job is quickly being replaced with "In nine days I have nowhere to live." That's not strictly true. I have an open invite for another two weeks anyway. 

But I talked to MG today and she all but convinced me to come to PA, live in her parents' rental flat and find a job locally- preferably on the same shift as her hubby so we could carpool.

Problem. I'm not fine with this. And I knew I wasn't fine with it, but I all but said I would, after I talked further to the HR people at her husband's work. I can't do this. I can't go to PA on the off-chance, and while I care very deeply about MG and her husband, I don't think I could live in proximity to them... I just _don't_. And I don't think I should go to PA. I don't have the money to get there and I honestly don't _want_ to go to PA. It wouldn't be as bad as moving back home, I don't think, but I wouldn't be comfortable. Maybe moving back home would be less uncomfortable. I honestly don't know. It's a mess. I don't want to think about it.

I just hate not having a plan, and having a lousy min. wage job, which is still infinitely better than no job at all. I just want things to work out somehow, yet I feel I've failed to put in sufficient effort. And then I think of the whole thing with my family- I'd like to ask everyone to say an extra prayer or two for my mom, she's having some important tests done this week but won't have the results back for another two weeks. It might be serious. Somehow I don't think that's quite hit me yet. I think it's a mental self-defence mechanism, the idea that if something's too big or too scary to contemplate when you're already stressed about a dozen other different things, your brain shelves it for later, no matter how serious or life-changing it may be. Your mind says "That's it, no stressing about this for now." But since you can't just make it go away, the thing that's bothering you comes out in other things- weird dreams, giddy emotional highs and lows..

Okay. Breathe. This is imram-going. This is not easy. All of life is a set of interconnected imrama. It doesn't have to make sense right now. It doesn't have to fit together the way you thought it should. It will very likely be hard, uncomfortable and never dull. But right now, even after I finally landed a job, I still have that need for something else to go right for me.

Maybe it's all an exercise in patience. I know I still need to get closer to God. Things just keep adding up to the point that it's either get closer or have a complete melt-down.

I apologise to my readership. This post thus far has been monumentally... weird and depressing. And highly personal. Maybe too personal. I don't know... I tried to do an lj-style cut on this post but it didn't work. I found out how to do something similar but it involved messing with the templates which is more than I can manage at this particular moment in time. 

Anyway. Onto less depressing stuff!

MarineWife and MarineJoe had a lovely wedding and reception. This was not marred in the least by T-Bro and I getting horribly lost on the way and having a mishap with the gift- remedied but at the very last minute in typical family style.It wasn't nearly as crowded as I thought it would be at either the church or the reception. The Mass was beautiful, MarineWife's dress was beautiful too! >squee!<>

So I compared weddings- MG's and MarineWife's. MarineWife wins, if not by a landslide then by a clear majority. I love both MG and MarineWife sort of as cousins of my own choosing, and I'm very happy for both of them- and having seen them both get married and having known them both, I predict a much smoother first year for MarineWife and MarineJoe. I could be wrong, but I'm willing to bet I'm right... we'll have to wait and see I suppose. Anyway, the reception was very nice. It was interesting to see the age range of the guests and how they approached the wedding as a whole- how many weddings they'd been to recently or altogether and their opinions on different things.

For instance, GS and I had a very long involved discussion that lasted us the entire car ride home (all ten- fifteen minutes?) about dresses, what the men should wear, how to run the reception, flowers, shoes, the works. GS had some really great ideas about the dresses too- for a guy he's very insightful about such things! I was pleasantly surprised and we had a great conversation. 

In unrelated news, I must say, little K-ski is growing up! She seems to be well aware of the fact that she'll be a senior next year- with all the duties and the privileges that entails. For such a retiring personality she can be surprisingly forceful at times! She'll be one to watch- look out world!;)

All right- that may not be all the news that's fit to print, but I'm tired and I need to sleep, the dancing has taken it out of me and if I don't want to sleep through the last Shakespearean Sunday, I should call it quits now.

Btw, please, dear readership (all five of you or however many) let me know if the stuff at the beginning of this post was too personal in your opinion, and best left to the pages of a diary. Your opinions do matter to me and I don't want to be hanging out the laundry as it were. That's not really the metaphor I want, but it'll have to do for now, I'm tired...

End of a week

Where did it go? How did it drag so badly sometimes and just fly in other places? And why do I still have about a half-dozen emails to answer? My life hasn't been that hectic- has it? Maybe it has... Anyway.

No word yet about the third shift job at the factory. No word yet from the school about the contract. I'm really going to just write a short email tomorrow and post it to them on Monday at the latest. I need to know ASAP what I should be planning for. Do I need to be looking for housing for a month and a half, or for six months in the States? Longer? We'll see.

What else? I need to do something creative/useful. Chigger still hasn't sent me my latest revisions/corrections list. 

Tomorrow is Former Roomie and MarineJoe's wedding. I saw Former Roomie's dad today. He didn't look as stressed as I thought he might, though that might have been because he was out of range of the ladies of the family who are probably doing a fair bit of stressing/last minute planning. I don't know. Maybe they're not. Former Roomie was usually pretty good about getting things planned- it was mostly other people not getting their act together that got in her way.

Anyway, as of tomorrow she will hereby be known as MarineWife. And no, I don't think it's degrading. At one point I would have thought that- I thought the screenname 'Glorfindel's_Girl' was degrading. It made it sound as though said girl was just an appendage. I think MarineWife will be an accurate description of Former Roomie's status and role, not just in relation to MarineJoe but as an individual with the right blend of nerve and kindness to be a permanent NCO to one freakin' lucky guy! Maybe more like XO than NCO, but I guess it depends on how big a task force they're going to be commanding. ;) 

Wow... I've joked before about being 'Aunt Bolyongok' but it has hit me again that I might get that honorary title in a few years. Maybe. If I don't, I won't be disappointed. If I do, I'll be highly amused.

And tomorrow being a party, I will probably post something in the morning after my apartment hunt. Don't count on an update about the wedding until Sunday, if then. But please keep Former Roomie and MarineJoe in your prayers as they enter the newest phase of their lives- an adventure, with all the attendant ups and downs.

2nd Job? Bring it!

So I worked it out- if I'm working part time at Subway 5 days a week for 6 hours a day, that's thirty hours. If I work five days a week, eight hours a day at this factory/warehouse third shift thing, that'll be forty hours. Thirty plus forty is seventy. Yeah. I did some more math and figured out that basically all I'll be able to do in the time between jobs is eat, take a shower and sleep. But I might possibly be able to make everything work. Still waiting on a contract from the school. Still don't know where I'm going to live after the end of the month. Getting a little bit desperate... I think I'll try the apartments for rent on Main St. They're probably out of my price-range, but might be negotiable considering we're currently in a less than ideal market for housing. And that I just want the place for two months, about... As far as I know anyway... That's the awkward thing of not having a contract yet. I'm seriously going to write tomorrow to see about that. If I don't have something in hand by mid-July, like a month from now at the very latest, I just don't see how it can work out. I _have_ to have some time to buy a plane ticket....

All right. Enough of that. Enough of thinking too hard about things that are mostly out of my control. 

In other news, my sense of direction is not as bad as I thought, but I swear the owners of mapquest must have shares in petrol because I burned way too much today looking for this *&^&*%^% temp agency that would not have been that hard to find if I hadn't had 'helpful' directions... Arghh...

Anyway. Do I have any cheerful, upbeat/happy news to report? Yes! Former Roomie and MarineJoe are getting married on Saturday! I'm so excited! It's going to be great!

And that's the extent of my good news. If I get inspired, I might post something more later tonight, but the odds of that aren't good because I had to get up early today and now I'm _really_ tired. But I might anyway... Off to a holy hour for now.

More on housing crisis and computers

Last things first.

I hereby resolve that if I am ever borrowing someone's computer I will NOT:

1. Use it to write any kind of poetry and take as long as necessary to get inspired. Even if it's supposed to be short like haiku because that takes even more thought to make all the syllables come out right.

2. Carelessly click on a bad link that will cause the computer's owner to flip out and have to reset all kinds of things to make the computer happy again.

3. Chat with friends on even an 'inscreen' message system, because it's time consuming.

4. Insist on showing people my FB pics ad nauseum...

In slightly more serious news- the place in PA called me back, but they can't seem to decide if they want to hire me or not- they require a background check and a physical. I'm not willing to pay for a bus ticket to PA without a guaranteed job at the other end, or at least a darn good chance at a job. A bird in hand and all of that. Speaking of which, one of my coworkers at Subway is also working 3rd shift at a factory- 11.25/hr. She said they're still hiring third shift so tomorrow at an ungodly early hour I have to get to this temp agency, take a drug test, verify I am who I say I am and HOPEFULLY get another job. With two, I should really be able to make ends meet. The difficulty is going to be transport. I'll be depending on coworker for this... she seems dependable, or at least determined to earn money and I'm sure she wouldn't object to me paying for half the gas for this... We'll see how it goes. 

I still need to find somewhere to live, ASAP.

Okay, I know this is a short post, but I'm tired and I have to get up super-early tomorrow, so it will remain short.

All the best, my dear readership! (And pray for me, or my guardian angel will poke you.)

Manna from...Subway? Birds. And 'Family'

So I have a lot of thoughts I'd like to commit to this blog. Give that it's getting late, I'm not sure how many will make it so I put the key points in the title. Anything in the title that I fail to explain adequately will thus annoy my readership and hopefully get them to write me a comment to remind me what I've forgotten to cover.

First big news of the day- windfall! Free bread! Yep, someone (not me) 'burned' 2 pans of bread today. Burned... Okay, when I think burned, I think blackened exterior, toasted interior and unfit for human consumption. Burned is not 'a little browner than it ought to be'. But until I spoke up, my manager would have been happy to toss eight perfectly good if slightly browned loaves of bread! Waste not, want not. I think I worried her a bit though- when she said I could take them she said so in the tone of voice that suggested if she had another minute or two spare (you never do between 11.30 and about 3) she would write down the number of a soup kitchen or some other charitable organisation. My positive enthusiasm about said bread was apparently alarming. Still, when you're on short commons, you really know it... I may or may not have mentioned in an earlier post that the bottom eighth of my box of oat bran went bad so I had to toss it, and my rolled oats are almost a year past their sell-by date. I'm not sure if that _actually_ means they're bad... They smell okay. And I still have two tins of tomato soup left, one carton of butternut squash... Okay, back to the post at hand.

So I was walking back with my windfall of bread, my 'manna from Subway', when I got to the big hill that leads to my road. And there, on the road but near the curb was a little lump. This resolved itself, as I got closer, into a very, very still fledgling. It was alive. And it was bigger than most of the poor little things that you see dead, that fell out of their nests way too early. This one had feathers at least. And it wasn't dead. It wasn't happy, but it wasn't dead. It was trying to play dead though, I think. It messed up there by blinking. So I stopped a truck from hitting it, and in the process asked the lady who owned the truck if she had a shovel, or newspapers or something with which to move the poor thing to a safer location. All the while, the bird's parents were squalking and trying to fly interference for it. I think they got their neighbours in on the act too. She said she didn't but to try her house and that her father might have something suitable. I screwed up my courage to the sticking place and marched up to the front door of a total stranger to demand (politely request) his newspaper. While he got it, I went back to guard the bird from getting run over. When I finally got the paper, I tried to scoop the bird up onto it, but it wouldn't go. Now it decided that the whole 'playing dead' thing was not working, so it wobbled across the road. And by across, I mean that this not very intelligent avian decided to go ACROSS the street. Not into the yard that was closer. I think it was because it was facing that yard and got tunnel vision or something... I dunno. Anyway, I chased it carefully across the road, convinced that it was going to keel over of a weak heart any minute and more or less oblivious to the fact that I was causing, what was for FR, a major traffic jam. Then the lady who lived in the house where the birds had apparently been nesting finally got to park her car and came out to investigate. She said that once we got the fledgling into the neighbour's yard, it should be relatively safe. Its parents knew where it was and would look out for it occasionally- as well as do their best to keep off the cats. We saw one cat looking hopeful across the street and scared it off. I felt bad that there was nothing else I could do, but there wasn't, so I said a quick prayer to St. Francis and proceeded to walk home. I have never felt so much fellow feeling with a dumb animal before. And it's all for nothing, I'm sure. I'm fairly certain the cat got it. Or it was stupid and hopped right back into the road. But I tried, and stupidly enough, I feel better for having tried. I know I'm projecting allegory and meaning on to the whole darned thing, but I feel like I know something about having a hard time leaving the nest. Anyway, it certainly livened up my walk home.

Last topic of the night- family. The M___s came over for dinner tonight, which was nice because I got a chance to see LittleM, as I had not been able to before. And as we all finally sat around the table for dinner, I was struck by an odd feeling that had occurred to me almost from the moment the M___s came in. It's like having extended family over. If the five of us here are immediate family, our friends/former classmates are a kind of extended family. The nice thing about this extended family is that it doesn't bring its baggage to the dinner table, so we all had a great time talking about our plans for the future (or lack thereof) and our experiences with Seton and later college. It really felt like... family of a weird sort. The whole 'friends are the family you choose' idea, maybe? At the risk of sounding sappy, that's kind of what it was like. I liked it. It was peaceful and fun, just like our Shakespearean Sundays are. I don't want to idealize all of this, but it's just been so nice...

Which brings me to the next big point of prayer- it's still housing. Still no luck. Still need to hear a definite yes/no from the print shop. 

And a freaking HUGE bug just crawled out of nowhere to be summarily pinned under one of my bargain bin books and some assorted groceries- eurgh! It was disgusting and huge... Hopefully it's now dead.

More news later. Like tomorrow later.

2nd Day of Work and contemplating the hair dye...

And amazingly enough I still don't hate it. Not that it's not tiring. And I know for a fact that I don't want to be doing this for the rest of my natural span of years. I want to do something that engages my intellect just a tiny bit more. That being said, I think this is improving my memory at least... now I just need to wait for my body to catch up with what my brain is processing- pickles do not equal onions, though both are very tasty and go well together.

Good news! I got more hours this week- a whole four hours more, yay! So that means I start at 10 tomorrow morning! So I should probably make this a short-ish post. We'll see how it goes.

I won't bore my readership (see, some boring people would call you 'small group of friends who are for whatever strange reason choosing to read this rambly blog-thing', but I have bestowed upon you the title of readership) with the details of my work. You've all presumably been to a Subway. You see your sandwich made, 'nuff said.

Skipping that, I will go straight to the interesting stuff.

This morning, I finally talked to Fr. P about my whole situation. He gave me some very good, very sound advice. He didn't condemn me and my aspirations outright, for which I was very grateful. He didn't even say I shouldn't carry on with my plans as they stand. The four big points I got from him were these:

1. Stay safe.

2. Get some more cash, if you can via charitable organisations/individuals etc. While you might not starve, you do want to travel a little.

3. God sometimes says "I forbid" and "I command". More frequently it's "I invite" and "It's not the best if you". So worry less about that.

4. Draw closer to God. It's His approval that you need, not your parents'.

It was really good to talk to him today. I felt like such a basket-case, but he listened to me like I was a sensible/sane adult with legitimate concerns and plans...

To more mundane matters now- thunderbolts and lightening! The FR area had plenty of both today, so I was very glad that a co-worker offered to drive me home. I got home, sat around for a bit reading a book, went to Martin's with WoodSmith and Guadalupe and did some shopping. I got a melon for 2.56 but I had to break a twenty so I was miffed. I also posted the all-important check for the loan company. I put too much postage on it, but it was either that or wait another day in the off chance that I would eventually get to the post office and buy myself stamps of the appropriate odd/fiddley denomination and actually mail the ^&*#$^ thing. I also drank the celebratory iced-tea that I was going to drink after my first day of work. But whatever, it's within the octave, right?

And speaking of things to mark the first day of work... you all may or may not recall my promise/threat to dye my hair. I'm still working on bringing that about. They have this annoying little pre-test thing you're supposed to do in case of allergies. I have to do that today and the earliest I can dye my hair is Thursday, I think. Rest assured though, when I eventually do, I will post pictures for your amusement/dismay.

What else? Today really wasn't very interesting. I stared at my disaster area of a room and resolved to do something about it- tomorrow. Having secured a job, the big prayer intention right now is a place to live.

I read some more Fulton Sheen tonight. I really need to get my own copy of that book, there are just too many parts I want to underline! Of course, sometimes he's a little repetitive but overall, he's great!

Tired...

Had a very busy day today. Didn't do that much but it felt busy. I did manage to call my dad today- not that long ago at all. Something of an eleventh hour call, but I did manage it on the right day- I wasn't lame and I didn't put it off until tomorrow. We talked for a bit and I get the feeling he's supportive in that seeing me flail around a bit about what I'm doing with my life fits his definition of 'character building'.  I dunno. But I get the feeling that he's feeling a bit let down by my lack of a definite career right now- making sandwiches is an opportunity, not a career. I realise that. I'm working with my opportunity to get where I want to go.

Speaking of which, I'm going to talk to Fr. P tomorrow and get his opinion on the whole thing. I think I'll have a hard time putting it all across in a very logical, planned out fashion and I'm afraid he's going to think I'm a hysterical female or some such, but I'm going to try anyway.

First Day of Work

The upsides- 

-I have a job!! I mentioned this before, but I still think it's worthy of significant notice. I'm still quite pleased that I have one and am still prone to go on about the dignity of work. 

-I also get a FREE SANDWICH on my lunch break! It's great! Granted, working in a place dealing with food you usually resolve never to eat anything served there again. That hasn't happened yet. Maybe it will, but I hope not.

-It's not that far to walk, it's about eight minutes. It was nasty and muggy out today, but once inside, it was fine.

-The work varies a lot. I like that. Plenty of change. No two orders the same. Although an awful lot of people like mayo on their sandwiches and it's hard to go wrong with lettuce and tomato.

The downsides

-My coworkers' choice in music. Rap. Out of all the music I absolutely positively CANNOT stand, it had to be rap. Well, I take hope in the fact that they have heard of Areatha Franklin and MIGHT be persuaded to switch to Motown if I whinge enough about it or something... I dunno. This will have to be done carefully.

-Standing. All. The. Time. But it's good exercise. You burn calories the whole time.

-The pay. It's not much... It's really not. I'm going to be in serious trouble if I can't find a cheap place to live.

Work related stats so far:

1- burned finger on an oven mat thing.

2- customers who spoke Spanish and caused me to realise I need to brush up seriously on my Spanish words for veggies. I can say "Otro mas?" and "Que?" but beyond that I need a review.

4-oz of pastrami per tray, which really looks like a lot... hope I read that right...

5-days of work this coming week

18- tomatoes make a full container of tomato slices.

Everything Happens At Once!!

Aahh! I thought I had a title for tonight's post, but seriously, everything happens at once! That being said, throughout this entry I will italicise titles that I would have used but didn't because there was too much to write about that wouldn't fit under that heading. So I'll start off in a logical fashion- timeline style sort of thing. Also sort of highlights of the day, because the bits in between were rather non-eventful.

1. I walked to Subway today and got an application. I got a little lost on the way home, but I found my way eventually. It's not that hard.

2. I filled out the application at home and poked around on MacAlister for a bit, and I found some awesome news!

IRELAND VOTED NO ON THE LISBON TREATY! NO!

Did everyone catch that? In case there was any difficulty/cottonwool/confusion, I shall repeat it in every language I can think of-

NO, NEIN, NON, NEM, NYET, IIE!

I could have sworn I knew more, but 'No' comes across pretty well in several languages. I used to know what it was in Arabic, but nevermind...

So what does this mean? Well, it doesn't mean that the EU is ground to a halt in its attempts to get a univocally acknowledged constitution, which is basically what the Lisbon Treaty is. It's more or less the same document that France and the Netherlands vetoed in 2005 in a referendum. This time around, THE ONLY EU member country that got to hold a referendum AT ALL was Ireland. As someone I read put it- 3 million or so decide the fate of 500 million or so. Doesn't seem quite right, does it? Because the legislative bodies of many of the other countries decided to push right on through and ratify the Lisbon Treaty- DESPITE calls for referendums from their constituents! And even now, after this has just happened, there are calls for a re-vote and people who are saying that "We'll work around this problem some how." What really got me was a remark from what's-her-face (Merkel?) in Germany who thinks that with enough diplomatic effort the No can be turned to a Yes. Meaning, if they pour more money on the problem and annoy/scare/confuse/harass enough people, the vote will change. I will be praying very hard that it doesn't. The Irish have spoken and let that count for something. Respect their sovereignty as a country! Fail at your peril! It's the attitude of superiority, the "Vote until you get it right, you stupid peasants" that I can't stand. And yahoonews is so biased. Incredibly biased. The way they put it, you'd think only rural people (read stupid according to them) who don't understand the Treaty voted against it. I say said people are NOT stupid, especially if they voted against something they didn't understand! If you don't get it, don't vote for it! And honestly, the blankety-blank thing is freaking impossible to understand unless you can cross reference all the things it does! It's a nightmare of a document! It is not designed to be easily understood, and it is/was hugely dangerous! 

I never thought I'd be on the same page as The Guardian... but for a miracle I find myself in complete agreement with the columnists therein who are saying that Gordon Brown should permit a referendum in England. He won't, it seems, but he SHOULD. And I'm agreeing with The Guardian.... and several other major English newspapers. Anyone seen some flying pigs recently? Has Hell suddenly become a ski resort? Well, if nothing else, this should certainly boost the ranks of the Conservatives in England- the Labour Party's stocks should be dropping rapidly!

A great big (posthumous) Thank You should be given to the writers of the Irish Constitution. That's what made them have this referendum at all. In other countries it was done behind closed doors, without necessarily the consent of the governed. So much for democracy and freedom. But the turbulent history of Ireland made it one of the worst possible places for a can of worms like this to be opened for public inspection and vote. Ireland has had a history of being dominated by a tyrannical government (no prizes for guessing whose), and the Irish people, it seems, are determined to not leap out of the frying pan and into the fire. Good for them. So it seems like a valid title of today's entry could be How the Irish Saved Civilization- Again.

Dr. O'Donnell would approve. Speaking of which, I wonder what he thinks about this. I wonder what most Americans think about this... I honestly didn't see a thing about it until after the vote was a 'No' vote. Nothing. Nada. But this is important. This is big stuff. Complete silence. 

B, what's the word on the street, as it were, where you are?

It really seems like Eternal Vigilance is the Price of Freedom.

And now for the local news-

I GOT A JOB!!

I never thought I'd be so happy to have a comparatively dull, minimum wage kind of job! Not that I'm not still looking up and really hoping that the print shop gets back to me. But between now and Tuesday it's a job in hand as opposed to however many may lurk in the bush. So I can't and won't complain and I start tomorrow at 10AM sharp! I really hope there's an employee discount on sandwiches, that would save me having to buy food. I can eat one real meal a day and have a snack or two and call it good. The next problem on the list is housing past the end of the month.

I think two important things contributed to me finding a job. First- I promised to spend more time with Our Lord if he found me housing and job. In a gesture of good faith, that started today. Please don't get me wrong, I don't believe I'm bartering with God. I do think that He wants me to spend more time with Him and having said job and housing will help a lot with that.

The other important thing is that today is (for another five minutes) St. Anthony's Feastday. So today I'm starting a novena, not ending one, because I'm special like that. The intention's for my longer term plans, that they'll work out well and the way that they're supposed to.

As I have mentioned before, contingent on my getting a job is my dyeing my hair. This exercise in creativity will be carried out Monday evening. I wouldn't wait that long, but it looks complicated and I think I will require help, so I'm willing to wait that long. I also kinda have to because there's this complicated warning about allergic reactions.

And since I have work tomorrow at ten, I will be signing off now.

Prayers are, as always, greatly appreciated.

And the band played on...

Or rather, 'And the search dragged on'. Because I called today at 10.30 promptly and was told that she had two other people she had to interview, but would get back to me by Tuesday. Basically the whole thing about calling today was just to make sure I was actually interested in the job. Argh... So that was disappointing/frustrating. And I spent the day doing a whole lot of nothing. Well, that's not strictly true, I did a fair bit of fiction-reading. I'm gradually working my way towards Winston Churchill's volumes on WWII, but I'm holding that off until the end of the fiction.

I did find out that if you add enough garlic, paprika and salt to tomato soup, it can in fact be edible by itself as a lunch. Although I'm still not terribly fond of it. The only way I like it is in relatively small quantities with copious amounts of grilled cheese sandwich...

What else? Daily dropped in today for a short visit- her ride stranded her high and dry (there aren't many other options in FR proper) in town, so she was stuck with us until Avrilyn and THE Joe took her over to her brother's house.

And Mom called today. This event precipitated an unscheduled Holy Hour- I definitely needed to chat with Jesus for a bit after that. So that was nice.

Even nicer- coming home to housemates who made steak (with mushrooms and onions!!) and served it with chips and dip too!:D After nothing but tomato soup, it was _really_ good! I wonder if they've started a secret society to see that I don't starve... One bad thing about a common pantry is everyone can see that my supplies consist largely of chicken broth and oat bran...

Now, the dishes await me...

Tomorrow- I'm applying to Subway, going to the bank, and returning some library books.

Nothing gets people to shut up faster than the simple phrase...

"Tell me about yourself."
Seriously, I hear that simple phrase, and every carefully put together thought in my brain heads for the mass exodus at the ears. But it came up today in my interview and I managed to blunder along after a prompt or two.
The end result was a tour of the print shop and being told to call back around 10.30 if I wanted the job! Now, normally I would say that this is the job offer, end of story etc, well done (and now I can go dye my hair). But what confused me greatly was the lady saying that then I would need to schedule a time for an interview with the Big Boss in W___. This confuses me. Have I or have I not got the job if I call tomorrow morning at 10.30 on the nose and say "Yes, I would really like to take this job." Is my job contingent on yet another interview?
Oh- and I forgot to mention- at the truly ungodly hour of 8.30 I got a call from one of the people who works at the gas station- calling to see if I a. Still wanted the job b. was old enough to hold said job (Yes I'm *&(% old enough darn it!) and c. had any experience. He seemed pleased with my answers. I still dunno what to think of that job, but hey, income is income.
I'm not going to count my chickens before they're hatched. I'm going to wait until I've filled out the employment forms for the print shop _before_ I start looking for housing in town. Because at the end of the month, I will need to be somewhere other than here. Things are looking up, but I refuse to get overly optimistic about it, if at all possible...
And now for something completely different:
Ambassador to Hungary
As if further proof were needed- as if my mother could ever forget (and yes, she could) that I attempted to do my 10th grade research paper project on the 1956 Revolution in Hungary, I have further proof of my interest in said country from the tender age of 19. On BOL, Draper started a Foreign Office, with the intent of all its contributors being 'ambassadors' to the respective countries they selected. These ambassadors would write original reports on said countries and post updates and interesting news from them when appropriate. Four years ago (appropriately enough on the feast day of the Protomartyr Steven (26 Dec.) who is the patron saint of the patron saint of Hungary named Steven), I wrote:

Katholish, could I please be ambassador to Hungary?

For those of you who require further demonstration of this proof, please visit:
http://www.boredonline.net/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=17&t=15737&p=434705&sid=2bf7acf885fb73e2c6e8f0cf03d6969e
You might have to be a site member to see it... I dunno. But anyway. I did write that, and it has a date and everything, so this is further proof that my interest in going to Hungary is, at the very least, long-standing.

And in other news, Gaiaonline has started to rot my brain insidiously. Hopefully as soon as I'm gainfully employed I will spend less time on it...

Revelations and Job-hunting

So, further job hunting today. I swear my life at present could sometimes double as a dark-comedy. Anyway. I went to St. J's office and I found out why the lady gave me a funny look when I wanted to advertise on the back of the newsletter- apparently that's a thing they do by _year_, not month, which seems incredibly dumb to me, but I guess it made sense to someone. Having done that, I proceeded to almost get run over as I went to check out a place my housemates suggested. They didn't know what it was but thought it might be worth my time. It wasn't. It was a training center for people with physical handicaps, so they can get jobs... So yeah.
Then I stopped in at a restaurant I applied to- no dice. The person I could talk to if I felt like it wouldn't be in for another half hour. I decided against it and walked home.
On an upside of sorts I got a phone call about an interview for a tutoring center. The woman seemed really thick. I know that's not charitable and I have no right to call anyone thick when I don't even have a job right now, but she didn't seem to be able to get it through her head that I could walk anywhere in downtown FR and I'd be willing to walk a bit further if necessary. She said "But what if it rains?"
I actually said "I won't melt."
... I'm bad, aren't I. ;)
For lunch today, SuprNico made an omlette and it was wonderful. After that, ZMas (who was visiting), SuprNico and I all played a game of Scrabble. We were interrupted repeatedly by cellphones and the house phone going off, and out of all of this, one good thing came. I got a call about an interview tomorrow with the print shop!! When I submitted my application I was told that there were about fifteen to twenty applicants for the job. I'm wondering if they're just being methodical about crossing people off the list, or if it's possible that I'm actually remotely ahead of some of those fifteen to twenty people. For my own selfish sake, I hope it's my good qualifications. Anyway. When I have a job, I can worry about finding a place to live. Funnily enough it was the opposite way around for this month/last month. Does that make any sense? I'm a bit tired..
Anyway. Now to the revelations.
Today I learned that I am housemates with not one, but two former BOLers!! SuprNico (of only three posts, but hey, I'm counting her anyway) and Avrilyn. Well, no need to search for a blogname for Avrilyn! Wow... And her boyfriend is _THE_ Joe! Previously I had thought of him as 'That nice if somewhat weedy guy that Avrilyn hangs out with.' Now he will forever be THE Joe... Wow... I'm still kind of in awe about that.
Oh, and for those who didn't know, I'm apparently Ambassador to Hungary. Hehehe... I will explain that in my post tomorrow. Until then, I will leave you on the edge of your seats or whatever other edged items you happen to have handy, because I am tired and my head hurts. I think I'm dehydrated. Anyway, consider that your incentive to check back on this blog tomorrow! And pray for my interview! It's at 2PM.